They do. And they don't.
I know it might sound confusing. People can change, but they change only if they want to change. If they get to that point where they don't like something about themselves anymore, they are absolutely tired with that thing, they start to change.
Everything comes front he inside. I know you've heard this a thousand times probably, but everything comes from the inside. Every single change that you do, you do because you feel you want to.
I read something a while back saying that "growth comes when you get tired of your own bullshit", and that is so true. That is what says it so well that you change when you feel there is something you want to change.
People can't change you. Never. They can influence you through how they are and you feel the need for a change to match them, or to become more than you are, but people can't change you. Just as you can't change anyone around you.
If someone gives up a bad habit, it is because they felt they needed or wanted that change. If they fall in love with someone and they know that person is so good for them and their soul and they want to do everything they can to keep that person in their life, they will feel the need to change in order to match that person, to give that person their best, because they want to, they feel that.
How do people change? Sometimes on their own, working hard on erasing years of habit and behavior. Sometimes they need help, so they go to a specialist, a coach, a therapist ... who ever they need and feel that they are resonating with in that moment.
Would you change for anyone? Truly change. Would you give up a habit of yours for someone? Would you truly? Forever? Think about it?
But have you changed because you felt it in you that you don't want to do that anymore? Or be like that anymore? That is the true change. The one that lasts.
When you try to change to please someone else, or because you are coerced into doing so, you will come back to your habit as fats as something goes wrong, or it gets harder. You feel trapped and unhappy. Unloved, unappreciated, unwanted, and everything "un" possible. But when you want that change, when you crave it, when you had enough of yourself in that state, and you change, it will be hard, but you won't want to give up. And every step you take forward will empower you even more, and make you want to do even more steps. You will feel like you can do anything, be anyone, and have an amazing sense of relief.
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