I Wish

 

 I wish so much that I would stop feeling like this. Like it's the end of the world. Like I have no control over tomorrow. And stop wanting to control tomorrow.

I see people going on by their lives, so peaceful and at ease, seeming like they have no care in the world, nothing to worry about. And I look at them and think how nice it might be. For a second I want to be that way. Then I think of all the things that I dream of, and everything that I want to accomplish, and I want that. I want that trill and that emotion. That amazing feeling when you're doing what you love and you're succeeding. That smile when everything goes well and you feel one step closer to making your dream come true. I love that feeling.

If I could just shake this anxiety and fear. Wouldn't that be nice? To actually live every day without having those feelings like you're running out of air? Without worrying that you might have to give up your dream. That you will live unhappy, doing every day something that you don't like, just because you had to chose something else. That fear that you might choose or chase the wrong thing. What if you're struggling so much and in the end you realize that didn't happen, or it wasn't your road? 

But how could you possibly want something so much and feel it in every cell in you, and not be right? Not be the thing that you've been searching for and dreaming of all your life? How could you feel like every step you took was there to prepare you for this, but turn out to not be this?

That's just cruel. To feel it so deep in you, and not be what you're supposed to do ... that's just cruel. Fighting so much to get there ...

Patience. You need to have patience. This is something that I need to learn how to do. Every day is a struggle to keep the patience and the faith that all you feel in you, is because you were supposed to really do that, have that career, end up in that position, reach that point. 

I am thinking of my career, but it could be about anything in someone's life. 

It requires the same amount of energy to doubt, as well as to believe. So, choose to believe. - I have seen this so many times written in posts on social media, and I know it is right. This is like: why think it might go wrong? think it might go right. Isn't that beautiful? That hope feeling. That calmness and peace that you feel surrounding your heart when you start believing that it could be possible, it could come true. You could be the success story. 

I feel like I can breath. And I feel my veins fill up with even more hope, and happiness, and power, and an "I can" thought and feeling. I can. I can continue the fight. I can continue the hope. I can continue to do my work. Cause, in the end, this is all that I can do, my work. I just have to wake up every day and do my work, and believe that each step that I take will get me closer to seeing my dream come true. 

All I can do is my work. All I can do. The rest will come. Do you work well, be the best that you can be, try to improve yourself every day and take one step forward every day through the things you have set for that day, and the recognition, the fame, the money, the living high and well, all that will come. Because the people who are good at their job, always doing their best, they always end up having the best rewards in life. Because the people who need to see you, they will. Be present, be there, and do your work, and you will make it.

Photo credit: Couleur from Pixabay

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